This is a new regular weekly series (every Wednesday) of 4 Audible reviews, broken down into the categories, which I selected for my first Audible blog (Dan’s Top 5 Reasons to Start Listening to Audible.co.uk) and subdivided, where helpful.
So, this latest one is ‘Autobiographies’, subdivided into ‘Actors’. Links to where you can purchase each of the titles for yourself (via Audible) are available by clicking the relevant title or photograph. Enjoy!
‘The Princess Diarist’ by Carrie Fisher
Read by the Author
Anyone who saw Carrie Fisher’s memorable appearances on Graham Norton’s sofa will know that they are in for a treat with this book. The title, however, is perhaps a little misleading – for those hoping for some fascinating insights into the production process of a certain science fiction saga there is little to see here – move along!
Indeed, if you were expecting the Star Wars diaries themselves to dominate this book, then you are out of luck, as they only constitute a small part, read here, albeit rather sweetly, by Fisher’s daughter, Billy Lourd. Even the diary’s revelation of Fisher’s affair with her co-star, Harrison Ford, is couched in such desperate naïve longing by Fisher’s younger self, that it does not really hold our attention, certainly not in the way it would, had the story broke at the height of the Star Wars trilogy’s fame.
What, I think, is far more interesting is the affect which discovering the diaries clearly makes upon a world-weary Fisher. She can turn her love of self-deprecating humour easily upon her 19 year old self but something poignant emerges with the 60 year old’s surprise at discovering the loss of her own innocence in their pages. Fisher and her audience know that young Carrie’s life is going to be forever changed by this ‘B movie’ that everyone, even the cast and crew, are so dismissive of, but which is destined to turn out to be one of the biggest box office hits of all time. The book is, of course, lent even more poignancy by the fact that this particular beloved Princess is no longer with us and yet here she is, wittily relating her own tender story.
A great loss, it is a pleasure to reconnect with her here.
‘Coreyography: A Memoir’ by Corey Feldman
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As a child of the eighties, you could not really escape Corey Feldman. Roles in iconic films such as The Goonies and Stand by Me propelled him to stardom. Whilst I loved The Lost Boys, however, I thought Feldman’s character, Edgar Frog, was too OTT and it was the boy who was to become his most frequent collaborator, Corey Haim, who most held my attention. Where Feldman was brash, Haim’s character in The Lost Boys was cool, brave and yet vulnerable. There was probably a bit of envy in my admiration, I went to drama school part time and dreamed of acting in films. I had expected, then, an audiobook in which Feldman revealed just how much fun ‘The Two Coreys’ had enjoyed as child stars. The insights provided into the back stage frolics of some classic films certainly provide a fun listen but what also unfolds is something altogether more horrifying.
Feldman’s career is one of blatant exploitation. When he effectively ‘divorced’ his parents at 15, despite earning in excess of a million dollars, only $40,000 remained. There are bitter words for his substitute father, the pop star, Michael Jackson, and Jackson’s alleged tendency to befriend vulnerable children, such as Feldman, only to drop them when he became ‘bored’ with them. Finally, the film industry itself is roundly condemned for damaging so many young stars.
Indeed, in light of the allegations against a certain Tinseltown mogul dominating the headlines at the moment, it is sobering to hear Feldman’s own account of the darker side of Hollywood. It seems that it wasn’t just actresses who have been subject to the casting couch but young boys too. If Feldman is to be believed, a group of film producers and casting agents, protected by their power in the industry, systematically abused young film stars, including the two Coreys themselves. It is quite clear that Feldman blames ‘The Two Coreys’ dual descent into alcoholism and drugs on their abuse and, also, that he believes that it ultimately led to Haim’s untimely death. It is sad that Feldman first made these allegations in 2011, that this book came out in 2013, and that there is still no real sign of this particular swamp being drained.
Feldman certainly has his own agenda and is occasionally a little too ready to believe his own hype but it is never less than interesting to hear these emotional reminiscences in his own voice. This is a sobering, heartbreaking descent into the Hollywood mire.
‘If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor’ by Bruce Campbell
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Best known as the chainsaw-wielding Ash from the Evil Dead franchise, Bruce Campbell arguably owes his film career to a childhood friendship with the director, Sam Raimi. Refreshingly, Campbell is perfectly happy to acknowledge and, amusingly, send up this stroke of luck in this book.
Campbell is the King of B movies, with memorable roles in low-budget cult classics, such as Maniac Cop and Bubba Ho-Tep. He does not seem to resent the lack of high profile roles but, rather, and refreshingly, seems to be delighted to still be working after thirty years in a particularly fickle industry.
Campbell emerges in this memoir as a supremely nice individual, who make a point of befriending all those on set, rather than possessing the ego of a star, hiding in his trailer. He has a nice line in self-deprecating humour, not least when discussing his astonishing chin, which rivals Mr Incredible’s in heroic-jutting status. If you have ever wondered what it is like to toil away at the blue collar end of Hollywood, this book is for you. Enlightening and genuinely funny.
‘Absolute Pandemonium: The Autobiography’ by Brian Blessed
Read by the Author
I offered a short review of this book in a previous post but here’s the longer version!
It honestly hurt listening to this book. I was literally crying with laughter, doubled up and begging Blessed to stop. I remember I was lucky enough to record some comic sketches at BBC Radio once and the technician told me that the funniest thing he’d ever heard was the outtakes from a recording for an advert in which the great man became increasingly frustrated at fluffing his lines and turned the air utterly blue. You get a taste of that bluster in this book but also some moving insights into his humble upbringing and his infectious love for life.
He might be best known as the Hawkman, Vultan, in Flash Gordon (and there are certainly some fun tales from that particular set) but Blessed has had an impressive and varied career. From a beloved character in Z Cars, through Augustus in I, Claudius and the bizarre world of playing a CGI character in Star Wars: Episode 1 – The Phantom Menace. Blessed is just as interesting in discussing some of his more obscure roles – his fascinating discussion of Kakogiannis’ The Trojan Women, for instance, made me seek out a copy of the film. I was pleased, too, that he included something about my favourite role of his, Exeter, in Branagh’s Henry V.
Anyone who has seen Blessed’s turns as host on Have I Got News For You, will appreciate his comic timing. Blessed’s booming anecdotes are the perfect antidote if you’re feeling a bit low. Give him a go!